Family giving is more than estate planning and tax accounting. As high-net-worth individuals have discovered, gifts, once given, take on a life of their own. It is not unusual for a well-intentioned gift to have a destructive influence on its recipient’s life, or to give rise to feelings and responses that can undermine relationships, alienate family members, and, in the most extreme cases, tear families asunder.
This book is about giving well―ensuring that your wealth will have the most positive effects on the lives of its recipients and their families, as well as on your own life. As the authors explain, giving, if handled correctly, offers a great opportunity to gain deeper insight into recipients as individuals and their needs, and to come to a heightened awareness of your own needs and expectations. It can improve communication within families, strengthen bonds, and promote the well-being and growth of all involved. And, when done well, legacy giving, like a stone dropped into still water, can have a ripple effect that will continue to expand and grow in positive ways.
Drawing upon their unique talents and professional experiences, the authors combine profound insights into the psychological and spiritual aspects of giving with practical step-by-step advice on how to do it well. For ease of understanding, they have focused on three crucial dimensions of giving:
The Who of Giving―understanding the needs and expectations of all of those most involved in family giving, especially the recipients and givers, including parents, grandparents, spouses, and trustees
The How of Giving―maintaining the delicate balance between many givers’ needs for control and the recipients’ need for freedom
The What and Why of Giving―knowing the gift options available to you―from money to business interests to values and rituals―including the authors’ “family bank” concept, a model that combines loans, trusts, and outright gifts and offers a framework and set of practices for long-term family growth
Read The Cycle of the Gift and learn how to tap the full power of legacy giving as a force for growing the material and spiritual well-being of your heirs, their families, and their communities.
Praise for The Cycle of the Gift
“A generous spirit and crystal-clear values are the foundation that protect a family from spiraling into dysfunction and entitlement. The Cycle of the Gift is the perfect blueprint.”
―Charlotte B. Beyer, founder and former CEO, Institute for Private Investors
“This is a remarkable book. It truly helps illuminate the issues and breakthrough conversations that families can have around giving to their children and grandchildren.”
―Charles W. Collier, former Senior Philanthropic Advisor, Harvard University
“The authors have given the reader much to consider–the spirit of giving, the desired effect when making gifts, and the function of the gift over the form. Like Family Wealth, this book puts a spotlight on the most important questions for family members to contemplate when making gifts and offers the potential for completely different outcomes from the experience.”
―Sara Hamilton, founder and CEO, Family Office Exchange
“With thoughtfulness and clarity based on a multi-discipline collaboration of considerable expertise, the authors challenge readers to mindfully consider the dynamics that occur between a gift giver and the recipient. The Cycle of the Gift is an invaluable resource for both individuals and the advisory community.”
―Dr. Lee Hausner, Managing Director, First Foundation Advisors
“The Cycle of the Gift is a must-read for affluent families. It deals with one of the most difficult and profound issues: how much should I gift and what process should I follow? It provides powerful insights to help family members become mindful givers and receivers.”
―Mel Lagomasino, CEO, GenSpring Family Offices
“This extraordinary book is a gift. Its contribution is helping us understand the complete cycle of any gift. The true gift of this book and of its writers is turning awkward situations and even pain . . . into joy!”
―Thomas R. Livergood, CEO, The Family Wealth Alliance
“The best learning comes when a book is able to take something that you do and consider important, and guides you to step back and look with fresh eyes. The Cycle of the Gift takes the process of gifting, a foundation of all society, and takes us on a journey to understand its deeper nature.”
―Dennis Jaffe, Saybrook University
“These well-versed authors offer a golden blend of technically astute practical guidance and the foundational spiritual and classical knowledge of wisdom, discernment, and counsel.”
―Paul G. Schervish, Professor and Director, Center on Wealth & Philanthropy, Boston College
“Families with wealth face a great and persistent challenge: how to give to children and grandchildren in ways that enhance their lives rather than create dependency. The Cycle of the Gift faces this challenge squarely with sound and prudent counsel. If leaving a legacy is important to you, this is a must-read.”
―James P. Steiner, President, Abbot Downing, a Wells Fargo Business
About the Author
JAMES E. HUGHES JR., ESQ., is a resident of Aspen, Colorado, and a retired attorney. Jay is the author of Family Wealth: Keeping It in the Family, and of Family–The Compact Among Generations, and numerous articles on family governance and wealth preservation as well as a series of “Reflections” which can be found on the Articles section of his website jamesehughes.com. He was the founder of a law partnership in New York City and has spoken frequently at numerous international and domestic symposia. He is a member of various philanthropic boards and a member of the editorial boards of various professional journals.
DR. SUSAN E. MASSENZIO is a psychologist and founding Associate of Wise Counsel Research Associates, a think-tank and consultancy. Susan has extensive experience consulting to senior executives, leadership teams of Fortune 500 companies, and heads of family businesses. Susan served for many years as the senior psychologist for John Hancock Financial Services, a senior vice president at Wells Fargo Family Wealth, and professor and program director at Northeastern University. Susan is a member of the Collaboration for Family Flourishing.
DR. KEITH WHITAKER is an educator and founding Associate with Wise Counsel Research Associates, a think-tank and consultancy. Keith has many years’ experience consulting with advisors to and leaders of enterprising families. Keith served as a managing director at Wells Fargo Family Wealth, where he founded the innovative Family Dynamics Practice. He has also served as a researcher at the Center on Wealth and Philanthropy, a private trustee, a director of a private foundation, and a philosophy professor at Boston College.
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