A book of hope, of resilience, and of passionate and courageous efforts to change people’s lives far beyond the narrow scope of your own community and immediate circle of influence

Imbued with both a fitting sense of urgency and a profound sense of hope, Changing People’s Lives While Transforming Your Own tells the stories of faculty, students, and professionals from a variety of fields who reached out to others after witnessing an injustice, poverty, or need in the lives of the most neglected and marginalized in society―and in reaching out, were transformed through the process of helping others.

Coauthored by two individuals who have devoted their careers to making a difference in the lives of others, this stirring book is a call to action, for both the young and young at heart, and is filled with inspiring and real-life narratives from individuals from a broad range of helping professions such as¿social work, psychology, and counseling.

Changing People’s Lives While Transforming Your Own introduces you to the basic concepts related to social justice, global human rights, service learning, community activism, and altruism, with a look at:

• The elements that are often part of service learning, social justice, and charitable work―including the joys, satisfactions, frustrations, and crushing disappointments

• Why people help, how they do it, and what they get out of their efforts

• Suggestions for how to create the kind of experiences likely to be the most satisfying and transformative

• Countless opportunities for readers to stand up for the rights of those who are oppressed

In addition to an accompanying DVD featuring stories, insights, and lessons culled from a social justice mission to Nepal, Changing People’s Lives While Transforming Your Own encourages readers to be better world citizens in the cause of promoting human freedom and equality. It shows how even modest efforts on a small scale can have profound effects, offering a vision of social justice in which professionals in a variety of fields can promote change as advocates, activists, and leaders.

Jeffrey A. Kottler is author of On Being a Therapist, and The Mummy at the Dining Room Table (both from Wiley), among many other books. He is Professor and Chair of the Counseling Department at California State University, Fullerton. He also established the Madhav Ghimire Foundation, which is devoted to helping the most neglected children of Nepal.

Mike Marriner is the cofounder of Roadtrip Nation and coauthor of Roadtrip Nation: A Guide to Discovering Your Path in Life. He has also coproduced the annual Roadtrip Nation television series that airs nationally on PBS, and has been featured on NBC’s Today show, CNN, CBS News, BBC World News, and NPR.

Changing People’s Lives While Transforming Your Own

Paths to Social Justice and Global Human RightsBy Jeffrey A. Kottler

John Wiley & Sons

Copyright © 2009 Jeffrey A. Kottler
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-0-470-22750-3

Chapter One

Paths to Social Justice

As North America and other Western countries become more culturally diverse, members of most professions are expected to develop greater sensitivity and responsiveness to persons of different backgrounds. Thus, one segment of college education in all majors and specialties is devoted to reducing ethnocentrism, that is, a limited view of the world based only on your own background. Depending on your race, ethnicity, religion, gender, geographic location, socioeconomic status, first language, age, sexual orientation, political convictions, and other such variables, you may perceive the world in ways that are quite at odds with those who have different experiences.

It may seem obvious that you can’t learn greater cultural sensitivity by listening to a lecture or reading a book about the subject. Your experiences in this arena can best be enriched and expanded through some form of direct contact with other cultures and people of different backgrounds. That is one reason why college campuses work so hard to build a student body that represents as much diversity as possible. It is also why you are so passionately encouraged to educate yourself outside the classroom by becoming involved in some kind of cross-cultural experience. This could involve a semester abroad, an academic exchange, home-stays in different communities, participation in cultural events, service learning, or a volunteer project. In many of these options, the goal is twofold-you are furthering your own education at the same time you are helping to improve the plight of those less fortunate than yourself. Students who participate in such activities often report that they also develop skills that help them to be more collaborative, flexible, caring, and sensitive to those who are different from themselves (Boyle, Nackerud, & Kilpatrick, 1999).

Altruism: Doing Good For Others-and Yourself

Why do people willingly give away part of their time, not to mention their money, resources, and energy, to help others who are less fortunate? Why would students select service majors or helping professions that often result in lower financial payoffs than their friends who choose business?

The simple answer, of course, is that we devote ourselves to the path that offers us the greatest personal satisfaction and meaning. For some, this can involve the accumulation of maximum wealth; for others it means making a constructive difference in the world-being useful to others in greatest need.

Altruism refers to behavior that is “other-focused.” It represents benevolent, charitable actions that are not motivated by personal gain or the expectation of reciprocal favors (Post, 2007). This sort of selfless giving is done without major consideration as to how it will pay off in the future. Compare, for example, a student who volunteers to work for a public agency to beef up a resume to one who has no ulterior motive other than to be helpful. Consider the difference between someone who works for Make a Wish Foundation to help relieve the suffering of children versus one who thinks it will look good on graduate school applications. We are not saying that good and noble behavior cannot be combined with furthering one’s own interests; we are suggesting that “pure” altruism has no personal agenda.

Regardless of whether you are interested in service to build your own career options or out of genuine interest in being useful to others, the effects can often be the same. When people are really honest with themselves, they will often admit that there are clear payoffs to them of a very personal nature.

They feel like their lives are redeemed. They are doing something that seems like it matters.

They are giving their lives greater meaning. Many have left high-paying jobs because they felt empty.

They are paying back what others have given to them. They have been wounded or hurt earlier in life and recovered sufficiently to want to ease others suffering.

They are following a spiritual path. This can be either self-serving (a ticket to heaven) or following divine inspiration.

They are developing new areas of expertise and gaining valuable experience. This can range from beefing up one’s resume to developing skills that will be useful in the future.

They are hiding from things they wish to avoid. Helping others is a good distraction from dealing with issues that may be painful, or avoiding problems that feel overwhelming.

They can feel like martyrs, making sacrifices and suffering deprivations for the greater good.

They are feeling useful. Their sense of self-worth and importance can be directly related to the impact they believe they’re having on others.

When Greg Mortenson was asked what motivated him to work so tirelessly building schools in remote areas of Central Asia, he didn’t hesitate for a second: “The answer is simple: when I look in the eyes of the children in Pakistan and Afghanistan, I see the eyes of my own children full of wonder-and hope that we each do our part to leave them a legacy of peace instead of the perpetual cycle of violence, war, terrorism, racism, exploitation, and bigotry that we have yet to conquer” (Mortenson & Relin, 2006, p. 335).

Many of these motives play a part in our own work, but the last one is especially relevant to Jeffrey’s story.

Fixing a Hand

The old man stumbled down the rocky slope grimacing in pain. He was holding his arm, bent at the elbow, with his hand upright as if in a perpetual greeting. In spite of his advanced age, he seemed far more nimble on his feet than I (Jeffrey) could ever hope to achieve. I had spent the past five hours laboring with heaving breaths up and down a yak trail deep in the Himalayas. This was the third week of a journey that had taken me to a half-dozen villages where I was organizing educational programs for neglected children.

Prior to the appearance of the old man, I had been trying to catch my breath while staring, spellbound, at five of the highest mountain peaks in the world. I was debating whether I had the energy to pull out my camera for another quick shot when the Sherpa who was acting as a guide rushed up to me.

“Sir,” he said to me, “you help man.” This was not a question but rather a direct order. It was all the more remarkable because the guide was usually so deferential, if not obsequious.

I approached the old man cautiously, not exactly sure what was expected of me, nor how I was supposed to help him. Once I got closer, I could see more closely his swollen hand that was so covered with blisters it looked like a balloon about to burst. There were white, pus-filled sores running along his fingers and palm, almost as if there were caterpillars crawling underneath his skin.

The old man was a dignified gentleman, dressed in a white shirt, vest, and tights, a long knife at his side. He was an impressive figure, all the more so because although his hand was grossly disfigured, he was obviously under great control of the crippling pain.

“You help him,” the Sherpa said again, pointing to the old man’s hand.

The old man looked at me and managed a smile between his tight lips. He held out his hand as if it was a foreign object that belonged to someone else. He turned it one way, then the other, displaying the network of bloated blisters that covered both sides.

“What happened?” I asked, partially out of curiosity, but also to stall for time before I could figure out what I was supposed to do. I was no doctor, at least not a real one. The last thing in the world this guy needed right now was a psychologist.

The old man and the Sherpa spoke for several minutes before it was announced with simple clarity: “Boiling water.”

“He spilled boiling water on himself?” I asked. “Is that what happened?”

Both men nodded.

Because I was a foreigner, it was common for locals to believe that I possessed medical supplies and expertise that far exceeded their own meager resources. They were not far wrong, considering that the nearest medical facility was a two-day walk away. If this man did not receive help from me, he would most likely have to deal with this on his own.

I looked into my supplies and found a supply of gauze and antiseptic cream which I proceeded to apply to the blistered hand. No matter how delicately I spread the lotion I could hear the man’s involuntary gasps. Adopting the manner of the doctor that I was now pretending to be, I handed him aspirin to take for the pain. “Take two of these now, another two before you go to bed tonight.” I felt myself stifling a nervous giggle once I realized I was reciting the line from some doctor show on television.

The old man looked at me with genuine gratitude, as if I had just saved his life, or at least his hand. He brought his hands up to his chin, forming the steeple gesture of respect in this part of the world. “Namaste,” he said, then turned and headed back up the slope with his hand still held aloft.

I walked on for the rest of the day, up and down more mountains, through rice paddies and mustard fields, passing herds of water buffalo, troops of monkeys, mule trains, and porters on this Himalayan highway. All the major Annapurna peaks were visible throughout the day, draped in clouds. There was more scenery and stimulation than anyone could ever hope to encounter in a lifetime. Yet I couldn’t get that old man and his hand out of my mind. I was haunted by that encounter, and I couldn’t figure out why it had such a huge impact on me.

Then it came to me: I fixed something. At least, I think I did. Surely I hadn’t done any harm in my brief foray as an emergency physician. Even if the aspirin and antiseptic didn’t make much of a difference, I know-I am certain-that my words of reassurance soothed the man’s pain.

I am someone who has no mechanical aptitude whatsoever. I can barely change the batteries in my camera and flashlight. I often break light bulbs while changing them. I am more than unusually proud that I can change a flat tire; in some ways, I look forward to those episodes, because in an hour I can fix something, make it better.

So it is that I chose a profession in which I am rarely sure that I ever really help anyone. Even when I do think I make a difference, I’m never quite certain whether the effects will really last, or even if my clients are just reporting imaginary progress. Most of the work I do, as a teacher or supervisor or clinician, takes many weeks, months, or even years, before I see substantial, visible changes.

Yet in about 15 minutes, I dressed the wound of someone in need and helped him to feel better. I have no idea, of course, what happened to the man after our paths diverged. Maybe he lost the use of his hand or even died of infection. But I’d like to think that, regardless of my rather simplistic attempt at practicing medicine without a license, I eased his suffering in ways that I long for every day with my clients and students. I know it isn’t my job to make people feel better but, rather, to help them to take better care of themselves and take greater charge of their own lives-even though this often means stirring up more pain. I suppose that also fits what happened when I caused more pain in the old man by cleaning and treating his wounds in order to prevent infection and aid healing.

There are times when I feel such despair at what it is that I try to do. Some of the people we all attempt to help have problems that are so long-standing, so chronic and unremitting, so severe, that whatever we do seems like nothing but a token gesture. The kids leave the session and return to their gangs or abusive homes. Those with impulse disorders, hallucinations, personality disturbances, chronic drug abuse, major depression-the list goes on and on-sometimes seem impervious to the most powerful interventions. When some of our most challenging cases do show definite signs of progress, we are left to wonder how much of these changes will persist over time, especially with a return to dysfunctional environments, abject poverty, or crime-filled neighborhoods.

Just once in awhile it feels so glorious to fix someone or something-to know that I really helped someone. That this experience of fixing a hand took place during such a brief interval is even more of a gift. It is also a clear indication of my own need to feel useful, how my own sense of potency, as a person and a professional, comes from continually proving that I have not lost my power. With each new person I help, I wonder whether the magic has left me, whether I have anything left to give.

I am forced to confront the sense of powerlessness I have felt most of my life, the drive that has led me-pushed me-to be so overachieving, to prove myself again and again. I realize now that my interaction with the old man wasn’t really about fixing his hand. He was the latest opportunity that I used to try and fix myself.

As I now relive this incident, I’m not certain the Sherpa begged me to help this old man as much as I jumped at the chance to do something useful for him. I needed this encounter. It had been more than a week on the trail in which people were taking care of me, rather than the configuration that I am used to-being responsible for taking care of others. Without such constant opportunities to be helpful, I feel like I am losing my way, even losing myself.

I tried to fix the old man’s hand and felt a degree of satisfaction to an extent that I rarely experience in teaching or counseling. Partly, this resulted from the immediate feedback that my intervention was effective. But it was also because my “client” would have had no other recourse if I had not been on the scene. It was as if I arrived at that exact time and place, in one of the most remote places in the world, specifically to do something useful.

I hardly have to travel halfway around the world to make a difference. It just feels like the magnitude and intensity of the experience was amplified by the novelty of what, with whom, and how it took place. It gets me thinking that I try to find my way by taking new, undiscovered paths that allow me to access new parts of myself. I only bandaged a wound, yet in so doing, I also healed myself.

In this book, you will read many other stories similar to mine, undertaken by fairly ordinary people (many of them students) who felt inspired to exercise their altruistic spirit and get involved in promoting social justice projects on a local or global scale. You will hear this theme repeated many times in your educational career, since it is currently a very hot trend to encourage, if not require, students to become involved in some type of service learning. It is reasoned that there is only so much you can learn in a classroom or in books-the wide world awaits you, with many challenges and opportunities.

What Is Social Justice Anyway?

No, it isn’t a gathering of judges getting together for drinks and conversation, nor is it a particularly gregarious and fun-loving judge. It also does not refer to legal proceedings at a social function. With that said about what it is not, social justice is a bit difficult to clearly define. It is one of those terms that is thrown around all the time, variously referring to righting wrongs, taking a moral stand, or fighting against some perceived injustice. Some fringe groups also use the term to refer to any cause that promotes their radical vision of what is fair and right (Lum, 2007).

Within the context of the social or hard sciences, health, business, or any other profession, “social justice” is used often to describe altruistic efforts in some capacity, such as advocating on behalf of those without a voice or for greater equity. For instance, the tragedy that occurred on 9/11 with the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon mobilized tremendous compassion for the families of the 5,000 people who died, yet 10 times that number of children die of starvation and malnutrition every day. During the hour or so that you spent reading this book, another 400 children died, most of whom could have been saved if they had access to health care and a nutritious food supply.

(Continues…)

Excerpted from Changing People’s Lives While Transforming Your Ownby Jeffrey A. Kottler Copyright © 2009 by Jeffrey A. Kottler . Excerpted by permission.
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